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In memory of those who have Crossed the Bar
CERVIN, Joan Congreve (née DOBSON) - Devoted wife, twin sister, daughter, adoring mother, mother-in-law, grandmother and great grandmother, loyal and witty friend, lover of poetry, babies and nature, died peacefully in her sleep at the age of 98, June 28, 2022 in Chartwell Waterford Retirement Residence Oakville Ontario.
From Joan's memoir: "what I have found is that love is the most important thing. [not] only the special love one has for one's partner, important as it is; I include love of family and close friends...it is rather loving them than being loved by them, ... that brings happiness"
Joan lived every moment of her 98 years with enthusiasm, curiosity and generosity. A progressive thinker and world traveller she saw the good in all people. The many charities she supported made lives better for children around the world, strengthened social justice, and equality for women, and 2SLGBQTi+ people.
Born October 8, 1923, in Melbourne Australia, "the traveling twins" Joan and Anne, aged 3 months, sailed by steamship to England where they spent their happy childhood. Years later as a mother, Joan dedicated herself to giving her own children the security and love that she firmly believed prepared her to weather all life's storms. When Claude Dobson, her father, died in 1940, her intrepid mother, Polly brought the twins to Canada by ship, during the height of the Battle of the Atlantic. As soon as they could, Joan, Anne and Polly enlisted in the Women's Royal Canadian Navy Service ("the Wrens") to do their part in supporting the war effort. After the war Joan became secretary to the Canadian Consul in Brussels where she and Val, an unlikely couple, met on a spur of the moment blind date. He was older, an academic, introverted, often pessimistic but persuasive and charming. Joan was young, beautiful, spontaneous and effortlessly attractive. They fell deeply in love, married and began their adventurous and tumultuous fifty-four years together. They moved to Montreal in 1950 where Cathy, their first child, was born. Following Val's jobs they moved to Toronto, where Andrew was born, and then to rural Essex County in 1961, when Val became a professor at the University of Windsor and Maggie was born. Joan volunteered for years with the NDP, was always there when her children came home from school, made many friends, and travelled with Val to France, Switzerland, Russia, Czechoslovakia, Japan, Spain and of course the UK to see Anne and her family. They were actively involved in University life attending and hosting many parties. When Val retired they moved back to Toronto, continued traveling, formed new, enduring friendships, played tennis and bridge, Joan served as secretary to the Condominium Board and they welcomed grandchildren into their lives. When Val died in 2004 Joan stayed in their condo, walked every day, read many books, did countless crosswords, cared for grandchildren and kept up her active social life. Joan lived independently until 2021 when her health and memory began to decline and she moved to Chartwell Waterford retirement residence.
Throughout her life, Joan made friends everywhere and was universally loved for her generous spirit, wide-ranging knowledge, brilliant conversation and outgoing personality. A gourmet cook, she hosted friends and family with wine and delicious food, well into her 90s With Val, she raised Cathy, Andrew and Maggie with a firm and loving hand, imparting life skills and values they cherish to this day. She knew countless poems by heart and would recite all 70 stanzas (589 lines) of Horatius at the Bridge to entertain her children on road trips. She adored her grandchildren and great grandchildren and was active and helpful in their upbringing, often rescuing sleep-deprived parents.
Joan was pre-deceased by Claude Congreve Dobson (father), Edith (Polly) Dobson (mother), Vladimir Cervin (husband), Anne Patterson (twin). She is survived by her children: Catherine (the late David Gass), Andrew (MaryAnn), Maggie (Dave), her grandchildren Andrea, Daniel, Zander, Tom, and her great-grandchildren Jason, Keira, Jessica, Gemma and Zola Joan. Joan's family circle includes Gerry Brosky (father of Zander and Tom), and David Gass' children Heather (Lisa), Susan (Craig) and Ian and her dear friends Gwen, Bob, Brenda, Grace and Frank.
The family send heartfelt thanks for the excellent, compassionate and professional care Joan received from the staff of the Chartwell Waterford Retirement Residence in Oakville Ontario, and the Personal Support Workers from Home Care Assistance and Paramed. We want to particularly thank Dr. Issam Obeid, Sylvia, Debrienne, Abbie, Pama, Cherina, Rose, Cherry, Sandra, Joy, Angele, Mira, Neethu and Vivian. With help from the family, these amazing, kind workers made her last days comfortable and peaceful.
And last words from Joan " [A] quick word to the young ones - don't ever think, as one does in youth (I certainly did) - that nothing will matter by the time you are thirty (or whatever) because by then you won't care. I assure you, you go on caring and, with luck, enjoying life right through it."
A service in celebration of Joan's life will be held Wednesday, July 6 at 1:00 p.m. at Turner and Porter Yorke Chapel 2357 Bloor St W, Toronto (Bloor and Windermere). All friends and family are welcome. Feel free to wear something colourful in honour of Joan's love of bright clothing.
In lieu of flowers, please send donations to Feed the Children, your local food bank, or Nature Conservancy of Canada. (The Windsor Star 02 Jul 2022)
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