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In memory of those who have Crossed the Bar
GARBER, Ralph - Died at the age of 98 in Toronto on December 6, 2023, shortly after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He was predeceased by his wife of 72 years, Eileen, who died in January of 2022, and with whom he had a loving and lively partnership, raising a large family, working for social justice and travelling the globe. He is survived by his sister, Harriet Schneider; and his seven children and their spouses, Jonathan (Ellen), Jeremy (Kathie), Judah (Rebecca), Jill (Kurt), Naomi (Liz), Daniel and Jessica. He was the proud, loving and supportive Zeyda to his thirteen grandchildren: Sam (Ariana), Judith (Eric), Leah, Miriam, Solomon, Jacob, Nicole (Alan), Neil (Annette), Samantha, Elijah, Gabriel, Benjamin and Dov; and the adoring great-grandfather to Elodie and Chloe. Involved and loving uncle to Michael, Rachel and Eric Epstein; Jed (Marsha), Nina and Nadine (Andre) Rabinovitch; and David (Sylvia), Louise and Dina (Matt) Schneider. He was a warm friend to many in Toronto, Montreal and around the world. Ralph was born in Montreal, Quebec, on April 2, 1925, to Louis and Lily (Sudarsky) Garber. His father opened a neighborhood store in Lachine, outside of Montreal, where the family moved in 1929. Ralph leaped and scurried around the Lachine locks, dutifully attended cheder after school, and learned to speak French, run and fight on the streets of Lachine. A few years later, the family returned to Montreal and Ralph attended Baron Byng High School. He was an outstanding sprinter on the track team, was elected president of his class, and lead an expedition of some classmates to Saskatchewan farm country to harvest grain and help the war effort. He was admitted to Queens University in Kingston, Ontario, but interrupted his studies to enlist in the Royal Canadian Navy Volunteer Reserves and was assigned to a mine sweeper that plied the coasts of Nova Scotia and New Brunswick. After World War II ended, he returned to Queens, where he learned to love poetry and plays, and received his bachelor's degree. He then enrolled in the master's degree program at the McGill School of Social Work, where he met his fellow classmate, Eileen Epstein. They fell in love and were married on June 5, 1949, soon after their graduation. They were inseparable and happily married for 72 years. Both Eileen and Ralph began working as group workers at the Montreal Young Men's and Young Women's Hebrew Association. In the summer of 1954, Ralph took a new job in cultural programming at the Jewish Community Center of Trenton, New Jersey, where the family relocated. The family then moved to a house in Levittown, Pennsylvania, a suburb of Trenton, and in 1964 to Highland Park, New Jersey. Ralph was a wonderful and engaged father: weaving fascinating bedtime stories; teaching his children how to swim, ride a bike and throw and catch a baseball; taking long summertime drives for ice cream, and embarking on various extensive and memorable camping trips around the US and Canada. Ralph took a new job teaching at the Rutgers School of Social Work in New Brunswick, New Jersey, in 1957, and soon thereafter enrolled in the doctoral program of the University of Pennsylvania School of Social Work, where he received his Doctor of Social Work degree. He taught at Rutgers, and then moved into administration, eventually becoming Assistant Dean. In 1968, he was offered the position of Dean of the George Warren Brown School of Social Work at Washington University in St. Louis, Missouri, where the family relocated. In 1973, he returned to Rutgers as Dean of the School of Social Work, and in 1977, he accepted the deanship at the University of Toronto Faculty of Social Work, where he served until his retirement in 1990. In the 1980s, he was appointed by the Ontario government to chair a task force analyzing governmental responses to child abuse claims, and went on to chair a not-for-profit organization, Justice for Children. He was also appointed by the Ontario government to review adoption practices and advocated open birth parent information to the adult adopted child. From 1988 to 1996, Ralph was president of the International Association of Schools of Social Work, and in this role, he and Eileen visited and lectured throughout the world, including India, China, Sri Lanka, South Africa, Hungary and Israel. He held leadership positions in the United Way, in both New Jersey and Toronto for many years, and believed in it strongly. In the late 1990s through 2001, he served as President of The New Israel Fund of Canada, which supports progressive organizations within Israel that strengthen democracy, women's rights, social mobility, free speech and Jewish-Arab co-operation. He and Eileen loved the theatre, their play reading group, and the Academy of Lifelong Learning. He was genuinely sociable and enjoyed striking up conversations with all he encountered. His cup of life was full to the brim, and he took pleasure in every day, even in his last months: his oatmeal with blueberries, the red maple tree outside, the soaring birds, the chattering squirrels. Special thanks to his dedicated, cheerful, ultra-competent and tireless caregivers, Jeanette Dende and Jennifer Padua, who lovingly cared for him after Eileen died. He leaves behind scores of friends, former colleagues and students, relatives and his immediate family, all of whom love and miss him. Contributions in his memory can be made to the New Israel Fund of Canada (416) 781-4322 (The Globe and Mail 09 Dec 2023)
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